Fake It Till You Make It

Fake it until you make it is a phrase that has been used in many different ways. If you look at them critically, they are based on an overlap of emotion, perception, and competence. The idea is to “fake it” until you get the benefits.

Act as if

First, you can pretend that you have what you desire or are the person you wish to be. It can be very healthy and helpful to fake it. There is no scientific support for the Law of Attraction, but there is some evidence that visualizing what you want to become is beneficial. People who use manifestation techniques like positive affirmations or vision boards see “acting like” as an important part of aligning their behavior to their ideal self.

These visualization techniques can be useful in many different areas. You can build your confidence, identify skill gaps, and have the courage to take on bigger risks.

The disadvantages of “acting like”

When I began my first job, I worked with a friend who was always lying about his possessions. He was a worker at a fast food restaurant, but he told everyone about his rich grandparents. He told us his grandparents were leaving him an enormous amount of money and that he had to prove himself.

He finally bought himself a Corvette, but not without earning a reputation for being a compulsive lie. It’s good to adopt behaviors and attitudes that are in line with who you want to become, but you shouldn’t compromise on your values.

He could have prepared for his future success by taking other steps instead of lying to everyone that he had a car he did not own. It’s important to know the difference between lying and putting yourself into an aspirational frame of mind. Visualization should be focused on the future and how you will behave in order to reach your goals.

He could have, for example, saved money, taking defensive driving classes, or worked to improve his credit score. Don’t use your current financial situation to fund your future goals.

Nodding and smiling

You’ve all had the experience of being in a meeting or conversation where you aren’t sure exactly what is going on. There have been times when I was afraid to ask a simple question because I did not want to show how little I understood (or that I had missed something).

As a former educator, I can tell you that there is a high probability that someone else has the same question. Even those at the front are grateful for the opportunity to clarify their understanding.

It can be helpful to smile and nod. You can use it to keep the conversation moving (after all, are you really interested in learning? It can conserve emotional energy. When other people are nodding, mimicking their behavior can improve the feeling of positive connection in the group.

“Nod and Smile”: The disadvantages

If you pretend to know something when you do not, it can be difficult for you to admit your mistakes in the future. You may find yourself in a situation where you are afraid to ask for assistance or risk revealing your identity if you fake it convincingly. Impostor syndrome can result from this. It’s the feeling that you’ve been ‘found out,’ or you feel like you’re not entitled to where you are.

Vulnerability, self-awareness, and growth are only possible when we learn to step out of our comfort zone. We shouldn’t fear being viewed as less than perfect. Perfectionism and anxiety are often exacerbated by faking it until you make it.

Presumed everything was fine

We all have days where we don’t feel well. You might be sick, distracted, or going through grief. We can act like everything is fine when we are trying to move forward. Parents and teachers may have called it “putting on brave face.”

This version of fake has some evidence. Researchers have discovered that even a phony grin can make us happier and more optimistic. Body language and actions can have a direct impact on our mood. It’s likely that you’ve had days when you didn’t want to do something but were glad that went. The gym is an example.

The downsides of “Everything is fine”

Pretending that everything is okay creates emotional pressure, similar to “smile and say nothing.” You may be spending so much time and energy maintaining a dynamic façade that you have little left for other things.

The process of dealing with your feelings is delayed if you pretend that everything is fine. It can have the unfortunate effect of making your feelings seem larger than they are. A burden is half as heavy when it’s shared, but you can’t do that if you want everything to look perfect and smooth.

This is known as toxic negativity. Toxic positive thinking can harm your mental health and relationships with others.

Imposter syndrome is a result of fakery

Imposters are those who pretend to be someone they are not or to belong somewhere they do not. Imposter Syndrome makes you feel as if you are faking success or qualifications, even if they are not true.

Fake it until you make it is a phrase that can help boost confidence but can also backfire. You’re basically saying that you’re “fake” all the time. This can be particularly damaging if you already feel unworthy or have doubts about your ability to succeed.

You may not be able to see the skills you need to improve if you are caught up in the impostor syndrome. You might spend a lot of time avoiding people so that you don’t get caught.

Faking it then becomes part of your façade. Impostor syndrome is a result of the feeling that your authentic self is not good enough to be where you currently are.

Faking it until you make it is not the way to go

Even though science suggests that fake smiles can make you feel better, faking it can sometimes get you in trouble. Here are three situations where you should always be honest at work:

Competencies

Faking competence isn’t a way to build confidence. The majority of people will take that to be flat-out lies. Pretending to be good at something you aren’t is not helpful.

We often feel pressured to appear as if we are experts, especially when dealing with the impostor syndrome. A new manager who feels insecure about their success may try to compensate by acting as if they know everything.

It’s okay if you are a new employee in a position. Be honest about the fact that you are not an expert in everything. No one expects you to be perfect, but they cannot help you if you pretend that you know everything.

What is the real secret? You may already be aware that you are not in control. You may be more frustrated by your apparent lack of awareness than you are by the questions.