14 Signs You’re in a Healthy Relationship
Nick Hornby said that it was no use pretending a relationship had a future when your record collections conflicted, or your favorite movies wouldn’t speak to each other at a party.
I am not a relationship expert or therapist, but I don’t think that the music or movies you like will determine whether or not your marriage is destined to be a happy one. It’s not perfect, but my marriage is happy and satisfying. I’ve learned a lot about what makes long-term relationships work. These things are not about musical tastes, or else I would have left my Beatles-loving spouse long ago. We’ve learned to compromise, both on music and other issues, and are committed to the long term.
You Speak Your Mind
Couples who can communicate freely and honestly are more likely to have a healthy relationship. No topic is off limits, and both of you feel heard. Communication is key to building a lifelong relationship.
You have your own space.
You don’t have to spend all your time together just because you are in love. It’s important to keep your relationship alive and to allow you to grow individually, even as you continue to grow together.
You Fight
If you don’t fight, you may be holding back. When people are in healthy relationships, they fight fairly and productively. This means that you should avoid insults or calling someone names. This also means trying to understand your partner rather than score points. What happens when you are wrong? You apologize.
You and your partner Like each other
It’s unlikely that your relationship will improve if you suddenly win the lottery, get a child, or buy your dream home. Don’t build your relationship on the hope it will improve. You accept that neither you nor your partner is perfect, and you value and get each other as you are, not what you may become.
You can make decisions together.
You do not have the final say. You and your partner don’t make all the decisions. You make decisions with your partner, listening to their concerns and desires. You may see Transformers on Saturday night. On Sunday, it is its turn.
You Can Find Joy
A healthy relationship is full of fun and laughter. It doesn’t mean she’s not annoying you at times or that you’re always giddy. But it does mean your life is mostly filled with happiness in simple ways. Making dinner, laughing about the same things, and finishing each other’s sentences …)
You Find Balance
You may need to be the chauffeur or chief cook when your partner is working longer hours. You may have to spend time with an elderly parent while your partner takes care of the household chores. That’s life. Your long-term trade-offs must appear fair.
You treat each other with kindness.
It is important to treat the person you love well, with empathy, care, and consideration. Take a moment to reassess your priorities if you are showing more respect for people you barely know than your partner.
You can Trust each other.
Healthy relationships are based on communication and trust without any reservations or secrets. Do you want to know your level of confidence right now? Try this test at the University of California Berkeley.
Let things go
You will be annoyed by your partner. You’ll annoy them, too. You’ll say things that you don’t mean. You’ll act inconsiderately. What matters is how you handle all of this. Did he forget to get milk again? You can tell him that you are disappointed. Then let it go.
You are Intimate
Sex is a part of healthy relationships, but it is only one aspect. Intimacy is more about friendship, bonding, and familiarity than physical satisfaction. You’ll feel connected in and out of bed if you are in a healthy, long-lasting relationship.
Your relationship is your safe place.
It should be a place of safety and stability to return to after a long day. It doesn’t mean that you never fight, but it does mean that you prefer to be with your partner when you are having a hard time than go out and commiserate at Happy Hour.
You only talk to your partner, not other people.
You should share your concerns and issues with your partner. Not your Facebook friends. It is fine to use your Facebook friends as a sounding board but don’t let them be a crutch for avoiding difficult conversations with your partner.
